Yes, it’s a real question and a common one at that. Is feminism killing chivalry? It seems like long gone are the days when men would court a woman. For all you 2012 men this means taking a woman out on dates in an effort to get to know her. Respecting that she doesn’t kiss on the first date or put out by the second or third or even fourth, and still sticking around if she doesn’t. This, opposed to making the first encounter an endeavor to get into her pants. People are doing things backwards in this day and age. Jumping in bed, and than making an effort to get to know each other after. Womp Womp! Ever been in that situation? Ever notice it never works out! Sex is pretty personal. Also pretty dangerous in this day in age. So getting to know someone first seems like the smarter idea. Now a days it’s hard to find a man who will even open doors for you, pull out your chair, send flowers, get up to offer his seat on a bus. It’s like men have no standards to live up to anymore. Why the hell is this? When did men stop treating women respectfully. Where is the chivalry? Are women to blame? Quite frankly I think we have to take some responsibility here!
Ne-yo – Got her own, Webbie -Independent, Destiny’s Child- Independent Women, the list goes on and on and on. Modern day women value independence. They value and take pride in being able to take care of themselves, pay their own bills, and not have to rely on a man financially to survive. This is great. We should be able to do all those things, we should be independent. Nonetheless I think maybe we should try being independently-dependent. There are certain things that make a man feel like a man. Honestly they are quite simple creatures. A man isn’t typically ready to settle down with a woman until he feels financially stable. Men take pride in being able to care for their own. If we are so independent and carry that “I don’t need a man for anything” attitude men really aren’t going to be inclined to want to be with us and be chivalrous. They may be confused if they should do things like pull out our chair, because us independent woman can pull out our chair on our own!
We have to allow men to be men, I guess is a simple way to put. Men like to know their woman needs them and appreciates their hard work. They like to play their historical role. Don’t get me wrong here, men definitely appreciate and independent woman, but also show them they are still wanted and needed. Ever listen to Jill Scott-The fact is(I need you)? If not please do. Women who read may hate me for this, but men also like women to play that historical role somewhat too. If you are a woman in 2012 and you don’t know how to cook something other than microwavable dinners then shame on you! Call me sexist. There is no excuse for not being able to cook a healthy meal for yourself or for your family. Oh, and in case you forgot the key to a mans heart is still through his stomach! Men like women who can cook! It’s womanly! We get so caught up in being that “independent strong woman” we forget we can still lean on a man, just as they can lean on us. We can still do womanly things, we don’t have to wear the pants. I always tell my girlfriends having man problems, shut up and let him wear the pants. Men like to feel like they are wearing the pants. I don’t know why, but they do. I mean how man straight men do you know who want to wear a too-tu? Ladies obviously at the end of the day the pants are really on under our skirt too, but like I said, men are simple creatures, just let them feel like they are in charge sometimes. Even if he makes less than you, make it known you appreciate his hard work. Don’t rub it all in his face about how you got your own money and blah blah.
Women I have said it like 8 times so far. Men are simple creatures. They are like dogs really. We have to train them to some extent, other wise they will just run amok. If you want chivalry you have to train a man to give it. I hear women say it this all the time, “a man can go around and have sex with whoever he wants when he wants and he’s not considered a hoe, so why can’t I do it as a woman?” Fighting the double standard! Women hate it so much! To be honest I both love and hate it, as you can probably gather from my above paragraph. Okay so it’s your prerogative, if you want to go out and have sex with every Tom, Dick, and Harry, do you! Just make sure they don’t have a friend name Chlamydia or Herpes joining in to make it a 3 sum. Ain’t nobodies business what you do so long as you protect yourself and do it right, says singer Genuine. BUT, if you are going to give away the sex so easy and as early as the first date, don’t be surprised when men stop thinking they have to work to get in your pants. Or if the man loses interest after that one night of hot sex!
Sorry, but no matter what men say they DO look at you differently if you put out on the first date. Even if they say they don’t, trust me they do! Their intentions shift to just sex. They don’t bother to get to know you, because they are already familiar with your punani. Men don’t want a woman who gives it away easy. They are only gonna wonder how many guys you did that with before. Sorry to break it to you ladies the double standard still lives on. Now don’t get me wrong there are some women out there who are only looking for sex from a man, so this might not apply to you. It does if you think you are interested in more. What the hell anyway, when did it become unimportant to know someone before you have sex with them? If we train the dog that sex is easily accessible then there is no motivation! Have we all forgotten about the power of the p u s s y? Men now a days don’t feel like they have to take a woman out and wine her and dine her and treat her like a lady to gain the possibility of a ticket into her bedroom. (Not saying men should wine and dine us with solely the expectation of sex). If we don’t ask for respect, we can’t expect it is basically what I’m saying. We need to collectively start setting standards from men in 2012 that they have to live up to in order to have a chance with us.
I’m sorry to all the feminists out there but in 2012 maybe I’m just and old-fashioned gal. I still enjoy working in the kitchen. I love cooking and preparing delicious meals. I love even more to watch my man indulge in the food I’ve cooked, it’s really actually quite a turn on. I love keeping a clean house. AND I still want to be the one to raise my children opposed to nannies or day cares. I enjoy being a woman in the old-fashioned sense. I still enjoy caring for a man (of course the caring goes both ways. Cater to me and I’ll cater to you). Not saying this is necessarily only a woman’s role. Kuddos to the stay at home dads out there, or the ones who know how to chef it up in the kitchen. At the end of the day men should still be pitching in on house work. Wife, not slave. I had a girl look at me sideways they other day at a party when I told her I wanted to stay at home for the first year of each of my children’s lives. She was totally disgusted. Hey in some countries one year is paid maternity leave! I went to school, I have a master’s degree, I can get my cake on and make great money to be able to support myself. I exercise my right to vote. I believe there is a place for women in every profession.
I am an independent woman. Nonetheless, I NEED a man. I am not even ashamed to admit it. I need a man to hold me at night. I need a man to raise my children with. I need a man to hug up with at the end of a hard day. I need arms to melt into. I need man to make me feel wanted and loved and appreciated. A man to make me feel special. A man to make me orgasm (ain’t nothing like the real thing baby). A man to steal kisses from in public. A man to consult with. A man to pray with. Amongst many other things. Can I survive and live without a man? Sure. I’m single now and I am perfectly happy and loving being single. I love myself enough to be good on my own. But I eventually sure as hell want and need one. There is no shame in that. I don’t want to be an independent woman forever. In reality we all have to depend on someone else sometime. My guns are there, I work out every day and lift weights, but I don’t feel the need to punch a man in the face everyday just because I have the ability to. I want chivalry.